Getting hip
Last month, I participated in the live reading of “Squishy But Firm: Sexcapades of a Crip Girl”, as part of the Kennedy Center’s Local Theatre Festival. Regan Linton unearthed subtle — and not so subtle — moments from her life and expanded on them in powerful, funny, relatable ways. I hope that it continues on to a full performance so many more people are able to engage with this powerful play showcasing disability and sex.
Speaking of disability, and especially since it’s National Disability Employment Awareness Month, it’s time for a personal update. Since June, I’ve been experiencing constant pain in my right hip. It’s keeping me up at night, making it hard to walk, stand, or get comfortable. Turns out it’s time for a hip replacement.
I’ve been using a cane for a few months now to help with my gait and to put less pressure on the joint. This isn’t my first rodeo with a cane; I had to use one several years ago when I threw my back out, experienced sciatica, and was recovering. But the ableism is something I’d forgotten, or just shoved deep down to try to forget. Like how oblivious people can be, not looking where they’re walking and bumping into me, or putting out their hand for a handshake, but it’s the one I’m using to hold my cane, so I either have to do a weird dance of shifting the cane to the other hand or shake their hand with my opposite one.
Then there’s the rude remarks from doctors. At the end of a recent doctor’s visit, after I’d just finished explaining the debilitating pain I am experiencing and my upcoming surgery, one asked me, “what’s with the cane?” Honestly, when would a better time be to use a cane if not when you’re waiting to have a hip replacement? The crip community could write doorstopper books compiling all these inane comments from doctors, friends, family, and strangers.
I was inspired by another Substack writer, Jackie W. who writes Disability & Determination, to consider a walker with a seat. I’ve never thought of using one, but seeing how it’s helped her save her spoons and still be mobile encouraged me to find one on my local Buy Nothing Facebook group. Thanks for sharing your story, Jackie!
Having the option to sit anywhere is such a smart idea. I could’ve used it a few weekends ago at a bubble tea festival, where the lines for food and boba were incredibly long. I had to get out of line multiple times to find a bench, missing out on time talking to my girlfriend and friends. Now, maybe I won’t have to be literally sidelined and can sit wherever and whenever I need to.
To help me prepare for my upcoming surgery to be more hip, please share your hippest puns, dad jokes extraordinaire, the worst eye-rollers. I look forward to them.